Word and Image

Don’t do this – what???

My (former) wife once told me my oldest (dearest, favorite) daughter was a funny looking baby, while she was still a baby. I ignored her and thought she was crazy. (Ha ha, you’re gonna go crazy wondering to whom the pronoun applies.) On those rare occasions when I offer photographic technical advice, it usually is thrown back in my face – sometimes vehemently. This was such a case. As is often the case we got a blast message accompanied by our little one in a green dress. I was immediately struck by the wide angle distortion – i.e. the iPhone was held high and above the child to create a large forehead tapering downward to a smaller disproportionate body. My gentle advice was promptly rejected and the purple shirt pic was sent to absolutely refute and state that, “She’s beautiful!” How does you deal with a second mistake compounding the first? Yeah, yeah, bad grammar; it hurts don’t it? The second is still wide angle distortion, the same just different. This time the forehead is still large because the camera is too close to the face and still slightly angled. I swear that the child is not hydrocephalic! And, I do indeed have pics of a normal head, face, and body on this very same child. She is no circus show attraction. It’s been quite a while since I offered photo advice because of past experience. I think I shall not be offering advice again. I will keep my thoughts: that this is a “funny looking kid” to myself. Even my own very beloved wife admonished me on this one, “you could have said it differently.” Ok! She’s a “looking, funny kid.” And, NO! I will not tell you how to correct this technical issue. I got issues of my own!

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